Sunday, January 27, 2008

Learning to be Selfish

So Friday McKay was gone all day, and I got a day to myself. I worked until noon and then picked up some rings from Tina who sells slings. She was having a play date with another mom and offered to let me sit and talk with them. I didn't do much talking, but I do enjoy watching other moms parent: having their kids say "I'm sorry" to each other and such. She also said I could come over and make my sling with her. I think I may take her up on that offer.

I got some needed phone calls in and then called J. She's training to be a doula, and I'll say she'll be a great one. She shares my excitement about my birth almost more than anyone else. She's also a firm believer in "if someone makes an offer, take them up on it." I believe that, too, but I don't do it as often as I should. She told me that when she had her girl last year and someone offered to help out, she'd say, "well, you can make me breakfast." I wish my visiting teachees would actually let me know when they need something!

Which reminds me of Relief Society and Enrichment. I like how Enrichment is set up: if there's a need, they can make a group for it: book club, exercise groups, play groups, etc. I think some women get stuck on the issue that there isn't a group that they're interested in. Well, then let someone know! If they don't know what the needs are, they can't arrange groups.

I can't wait to go back into Relief Society after this baby comes. I'll actually know when the groups are meeting and be able to go to them. It's part of my post-partum plan: go to as many activities as possible so I don't feel lonely and get depressed. There's walking groups on Tuesday and Thursday and a play group on Wednesday. And with the AP playgroups on Tuesday and Thursday, I should be getting lots of woman time. I'm going to make Enrichment work for me- that's what it's there for! My needs will be to see other women and not be alone with a baby all day and Enrichment will fulfill that need for me! Woot woot.

Although, I decided yesterday that we need a grocery shopping Enrichment group. McKay did the laundry (thanks!) and I went to do the grocery shopping. My issue is that I've been really people-needy lately and going grocery shopping was going to be lonely. I actually called a lady in the ward to see if she'd come with me (at the last craft activity, she said that grocery shopping was one of her favorite activities) but all I got was an answering machine. I'll probably try that again next week. I need to be with people, so gosh darnit, I'm going to get people to be with me.

I think when it comes to Enrichment, the Relief Society wants you to be a little selfish: if you have a need, they want to fill it, so let them do their job.

My poor visiting teachers... in a couple of months I will be taking them up on the "anything I can do for you" offer. I hope they understand the real limits of "anything."

But a lesson for everyone: if someone offers help, take it. That's why they offered. You just might get your dishes done out of it, and no one can complain about that!

1 comment:

  1. Thanks, Heather for the Enrichment plug! I think I will have to quote you at my next opportunity to help women capture the vision of this program. You nailed it on the head! Not that we want you to be selfish, but we want you to take advantage of the program. It is inspired and it does work. But it takes faith and effort.


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